Letter :Haiku




source
                                                                    
                                                                हाल -ए -दिल 
                                                               समझ गए पढ़   
                                                                ये कोरी पाती ...




                                                        read each word not there
                                                      touched your feelings, felt your love                                                                                      plain blank white paper



22 comments:

  1. This is the first Haiku where hindi version overshadowed the English one completely. Loved it in hindi.. re-read it with a smile :) Simply beautiful Kokila :) short n mast!

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    1. You are right Shanx .. I have to struggle to make it spontaneous and as you know struggling and spontaneity are cheese n chalk :) glad you liked the hindi one...
      mast comment on this from my other half - "main to tumhari bina likhi grocery list bhi samajh jaata hoon... tab to tum IS BAAT KO ITNI TAWAZZO NI DETI :/ ..."
      :P :P

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    2. hmm... Liked the phrase, "OTHER half" instead of better half. It resonates well with Indian version 'Ardhangani' :)

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    3. EXCUSE ME ! I AM the Better half ...! :0 :D

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  2. Must say, for the first time, English really looked like the duller version. Perhaps that's cos I was able to understand the Hindi version :).. Nice one Kokila :)

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    1. seriously Viany its the second time that I struggled to translate the emotion in a haiku from hindi to english ...and definitely fell short... Glad that you got the Hindi one :) and liked it too :D
      Thanks for the honest words :)

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  4. What a beautiful haiku Kokila! Superb! You took love to a higher level!
    Does paathee mean letter? Just want to correct myself if I am wrong :)
    I was moved by your caring words for me that welcomed me today in FB inbox... :) So sweet of you! Thank you so much dear... TC! Keep smiling :)

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    1. Yes Sindhu Paati or pathee is a letter .
      its a changed rural version of 'Patr' or 'patrika' ..

      Glad you felt that way Sindhu :) I was really wondering so I took the liberty dear :) Thanks for the sweet words dear ..always motivating and helping me to write :)

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    2. Ohk, patrika is a new word for me too! Thank you for everything.... :)
      It's my pleasure having opportunity to read your poems, dear :)

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    3. And my to have you as a reader :)

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  5. The Hindi version looks more beautiful indeed. I think there's something in one's mother tongue, some sweetness and smoothness which is difficult to bring forth in any other language. This is not a question of proficiency, it's instinct and spontaneity. :-)

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    1. So right girl ! But yes its true ..as this time i struggled with words... and for me its okay but lacks spontaneity...
      Thanks dear friend for your wise and kind words :) kaano main mishri jaise ....translated -'sugar in my ears' :) :P

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  6. I agree with Maniparna, the Hindi version is beautiful in its minimalism and starkness. Lovely.

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    1. Yes Beloo ... I am in agreement .It also tells how being spontaneous is always a better choice ... :) Thanks dear :)

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  7. Lovvvvly.
    Now, that Hindi was easy enough for me. :)


    Ah! letters -- the physical ones. :)

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    1. Yeah the physical ones... the ones which used to become fragile with time,just like the emotions in them..
      Glad you got the Hindi one Dee as the english one here , is certainly not my best :P :)
      Thanks for the visit pal :)

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